I think I HAVE to have this book...
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
I had a dream this early morning..
A dream so alarming that it woke me up from my slumber. A dream so frightening that it make me shiver. A dream so shocking that it makes me feel sick to the bones. There's this saying, if you dream after dawn (or accurately after Subuh ) it is definitely the works of the God-damn Satan. But instead, the dream made me come to a realization, of all things that I've done...May Allah forgive me for all of that..
~still can't for get the stare
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Friday, April 6, 2012
I want to be on the stage,
Performing, singing or acting..
Even though it is nerve-wrecking
but the adrenaline-pumping when i'm doing it
satisfy every running blood in my vein
even though i am not good at it :)
...pffttt, what am i saying?
I forgot that I'm actually acting everyday,
putting a fake smile in my face,
faking a laugh, reading the dialogue of lies
on a big stage called LIFE.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
It has been awhile since we met. How are you doing? I hope you are in a pink of health. I heard you have moved to a new place. Hope i'll have the chance to crash at your new place someday. Anyway, i feel like writing to you. I'm sorry if this letter bugs your serene life. I just feel like you are not you that i once know. I feel weird being around the new you when we last met,which was quite a while ago. But maybe it's just you, the real side of you that i never know. Somehow, I do feel the need to apologize to you. I am sorry if I ever offended you in a way that i never realize. I am sorry if the way that i speak annoys you. And I am really sorry if the way I explain something that I know or I have sounds like I'm bragging to you about it. I really didn't mean it. If you still feel offended by that then you really didn't understand me at all. You know, I was really taken aback by your word when I met you a early this year. After a long time we haven't met each other. You tell me a story about a friend of yours that i don't know who but the way you telling it to me seems like you been meaning to tell me that I am that particular person or I am just like the person in the story, I don't know why. You know how fast I can read people,right? And that's not just it, you also downgraded me in a way,well..we both know how you reacted that time. I mean, come on!! What have I done that offend you so much, really?? I have no clue at all. Are you jealous of me? Oh,If I were you, I will never be jealous of me. No dude,seriously. You earn more than me, you spend less than me, and you even have a steady boyfriend which I don't have right now,bitch!! Sorry for the language, I got carried away a bit. I don't know what the reason was and I even if I do want to know I don't care if you'll never gonna tell but as far as I know, you are still my friend. Even if you don't think of me as your friend I don't mind because you will always be my friend. Forever. And if you read this, which you probably wouldn't I want you to know from deep down the bottom of my heart inside, I am sorry for everything.