FACEPUNCH!

I think I HAVE to have this book...

chidapunyasukala

Is It This or Is It That..?!

 I had a dream this early morning..
A dream so alarming that it woke me up from my slumber. A dream so frightening that it make me shiver. A dream so shocking that it makes me feel sick to the bones. There's this saying, if you dream after dawn (or accurately after Subuh ) it is definitely the works of the God-damn Satan. But instead, the dream made me come to a realization, of all things that I've done...May Allah forgive me for all of that..




~still can't for get the stare 




chidapunyasukala

There's Been A Brawl at The Opposite Desks

I am just a watcher. An audience. With popcorns in my hand. And the water bottle by my side. 
And a smug in my face. 

chidapunyasukala

I Miss..

I want to be on the stage,

Performing, singing or acting..

Even though it is nerve-wrecking 

but the adrenaline-pumping when i'm doing it

satisfy every running blood in my vein

even though i am not good at it :)

...pffttt, what am i saying?

I forgot that I'm actually acting everyday,

putting a fake smile in my face,

faking a laugh, reading the dialogue of lies

on a big stage called LIFE.

chidapunyasukala

A Letter To a Friend..

Dear Friend,


           It has been awhile since we met. How are you doing? I hope you are in a pink of health. I heard you have moved to a new place. Hope i'll have the chance to crash at your new place someday. Anyway, i feel like writing to you. I'm sorry if this letter bugs your serene life. I just feel like you are not you that i once know. I feel weird being around the new you when we last met,which was quite a while ago. But maybe it's just you, the real side of you that i never know. Somehow, I do feel the need to apologize to you. I am sorry if I ever offended you in a way that i never realize. I am sorry if the way that i speak annoys you. And I am really sorry if the way I explain something that I know or I have sounds like I'm bragging to you about it. I really didn't mean it. If you still feel offended by that then you really didn't understand me at all. You know, I was really taken aback by your word when I met you a early this year. After a long time we haven't met each other. You tell me a story about a friend of yours that i don't know who but the way you telling it to me seems like you been meaning to tell me that I am that particular person or I am just like the person in the story, I don't know why. You know how fast I can read people,right? And that's not just it, you also downgraded me in a way,well..we both know how you reacted that time. I mean, come on!! What have I done that offend you so much, really?? I have no clue at all. Are you jealous of me? Oh,If I were you, I will never be jealous of me. No dude,seriously. You earn more than me, you spend less than me, and you even have a steady boyfriend which I don't have right now,bitch!! Sorry for the language, I got carried away a bit. I don't know what the reason was and I even if I do want to know I don't care if you'll never gonna tell but as far as I know, you are still my friend. Even if you don't think of me as your friend I don't mind because you will always be my friend. Forever. And if you read this, which you probably wouldn't I want you to know from deep down the bottom of my heart inside, I am sorry for everything.

Sincerely,

chidapunyasukala

Decision..

Going back home last weekend is not such a bad thing after all...not bad at all!

chidapunyasukala

True Story...

chidapunyasukala

You Think?!

"Good friends are like stars. You don't always see them but you know they're always there."

"A best friend is like a four leaf clover; hard to find and lucky to have."

"Best friends are like a fairytale. They've been there since once upon a time and will be there until ever after."

....somehow i found all these quotes and more of its kind a bit irrelevant this days,i don't know why

chidapunyasukala

Strong Heart

Some pain, they never goes away but the more you keep telling everybody about it, the more tougher you can live with it..

chidapunyasukala

What My Friends Think of Me as

thanks to those who painstakingly pondering on how to answer this sacred question. i really appreciate it. and to those who did not answer..it's ok.at least i know u never thought of me.





chidapunyasukala

what tha'....????

Then

whenever i speak or try to explain something;

"u dont have to shout..(eyes rolling)"

"dont be angry with me! (teary eyes)"

"im just asking, no need to be mad! geez..(disgusted face)"

Now

whenever i speak or try to explain something;

"can you speak louder please??"

"i cannot hear you, can you speak up??"

"u wanna speak or not,seriously?"

chidapunyasukala

;)

chidapunyasukala

Waiting....

even if i mention it like a gazillion times
i still have to do it
even if it gets me on my nerve
i often left with no choice but to do it
even it torture me, creeps underneath my skin, and screams loathsomeness
i have no options  
but to do it.


GOD, I HATE WAITING!!!!






chidapunyasukala

I Nailed It! But....

When people told me that i was good at something, i am kind of skeptic about it an this questions will immediately popped up in my head,

"Am I really that good?"

I'ts not like i have problems in trusting people or believing in what others said, its just like..you know...actually i don't know how to put it in words. I always judge myself the way i judge other people. Putting myself in somebody else's shoes and try to figure out what would they think if they see me act my way. It makes me self-concious at times, and also keep me on the ground and help me to behave.At times. And at times, I dont give a single fuck. Well, most of the time. :)

Anyways, i nailed the job interview at the company. I thought i would jump in excitement. Apparently, i don't. But that's typically me. I think i just become attached to my present job that its kinda sad to let go (just like other previous jobs). But as the saying goes, life must go on..so, kita ENJOY!!

chidapunyasukala

I Got A Feeling~~

the feeling that when you do something u never imagine u'll be doing and u did it spontaneously on the spot and you just go with the flow and it worked out and it excites you and the people you doing that something for, like it..its just out of this world!





chidapunyasukala

~I Wrote This For You.Really.

 

 

 

I wrote this for you.Really. For the one thing you want the most - the book. I spent hours doing this using Paint because i am so lousy at editing but i'm doing this for you. If I manage to win it i'll gave it to you as your wedding gift. No kidding,sis. This is really for you...

chidapunyasukala

Another..

Now, instead of two chances/choices,another one comes along rolling to my feet....
~if ada rezeki,ada la.....if not,everything happens for a reason..ada rahmat disebalik kejadian..



chidapunyasukala

Road to Be Taken..

Just like the diverged road, my heart is torn apart

It's my future on the stake, i have to choose smart

if i choose one path, will the road not taken promise better

or will the difference made by taking the less traveled by differ in a lot of good matter? 

but my concern is, is the path that i'll choose the right one for me

or will i regret my choice for the rest of eternity

~Ya Allah,please guide me..

chidapunyasukala

Geek Much??

Come across Geeky Bids ad from a file hosting website, click on the ad by sheer curiosity. It's actually an auction website with every item bidding from RM0.00, every bidding session increase RM0.01 cent. I got 10 free bids once  i sign up an account. Here how it works.

• All auctions start at RM0.00.
• You then place a bid.
• Each bid you place will increase the current price by RM0.01.
• The countdown timer resets everytime a new bid is placed.
• If the countdown timer reaches 00:00:00 and no new bids are placed, then the last bidder wins the right to buy the product at the final auction price.
• Winner gets back 100% of his/her bids as well.

 So if you are like me trying to look for cheaper bargains for hi tech gadgets, head over to this link here now!

i wanna redeem my bids now,hehehe..

chidapunyasukala

All Mad..

chidapunyasukala

Hari Ini, Aku Tewas Dengan Nafsu...

aku kalah..

walaupun sebenarnya aku boleh menang

tapi aku kalah

terikut-ikut, terbawa-bawa

sebab aku aku nak

tapi kemahuan tu satu dosa

aku tau

tapi aku nak jugak

padahal aku dah mengingatkan diri sendiri

dah tanam dalam kepala

tapi akal dah kabur

keinginan dah bermaharajalela

hari ini, aku tewas dengan nafsu...

chidapunyasukala

Life-To-Do-List..

New Year's Resolution

..and its already resolve!!!

Woohooooo!!!!!!

chidapunyasukala

What's Wrong With Me

Lately, my thoughts have gone mixed up. LITERALLY. I always lost in my own world,day dreaming alot and sometimes at time i was focusing on something (like work) suddenly i drift away far from the subject. I'm a little bit freaked out myself and I have no idea what's happening to me actually. I even think that my intelligence level have decrease a bit (hopefully not) to the point that I feel embarrassed reading essays that i wrote when i was still in high-school. My vocab are also not expanding a lot. I sometimes stutter or slur on words when I talk too. Its whether the jelly-like tissue that gluing my braincells together have lost a bit of their elasticity or I'm hibernating my learning button or I'm just not absorbing knowledge anymore or there really is something wrong with my brains..

Just hoping that I'm not shutting down...

chidapunyasukala

'Twas The Day After Xmas~

'Twas The Day After Xmas

.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

like this post, it's empty.

chidapunyasukala

Bella

"eh,dik!bila potong rambut?cam comey plak akak tengok.."

"eh,u oso beautiful what?see, yo face is full one, so cute!" (cubit-cubit,tepuk-tepuk)

"u very pretty today.."

                                                    ~sengih,~

chidapunyasukala

Allah is The Greatest..

Dah seminggu aq plan untuk buat dosa this weekend. And i've been waiting the day to come so excitedly sampai sanggup ambik emergency leave on friday sebab tak sabar sangat. Tapi when the day come aq jadi takut sikit,but still as excited as i was before. So, as planned aq pun keluar la dengan confident untuk buat dosa,kononnya it's the first and the last la..Sampai je, kat tempat yang dijanjikan, Allah punya kuasa aq kena menunggu pulak..aq pun tunggu la, nasib baik makanan sedap..for 1 friggin' hour aq tunggu,nampak sangat Allah tak izin..aq pn fed-up tunggu and pegi layan movie cita Alvin & the Chipmunks.(by the way, cita tu tak best..what a waste of my 10bucks). then tengah tengok tu baru dia mengada-ngada datang..i am kind of piss off and biarkan je dia tunggu sampai cita habis..then lepas habis tu pulak aq yang kena pegi mencari pulak..arghhhh! so pergilah aq...and then there it was, and as if a lightning bolt struck my head and aq rasa Allah sayang gila kat aq time tu, i look at it and  i feel...NOTHING. not as how i feel before,completely nothing...i don't know why tapi Allah maha Besar, maybe there is something wrong with me or something is definitely wrong about it yang tetiba melenyapkan langsung segala apa rasa yang aq ada..until this very moment im writing,still i didnt feel anything anymore about it.but i am so grateful that Allah has led me into not committing and adding more sin and i feel so blessed right now..
Alhamdulillah..Thank You Ya Allah!!

Unusual...

today,

everything was far from usual

the glistening glare from the moving car window

the stationary tree leaves on a windy day

the gloomy sunflower on the desk corner

the tainted glass door

the black screen

the silent phone

me.

chidapunyasukala

The Garbage I Become..

This i quoted from a blog called iwrotethisforyou..nice one,

Now the TV's on at 3am and you're sleeping on the couch, because you can.

Now the plate is where you left it, no one else is going to move it for you.

Now the politics of blankets are gone.

Now the people on the radio sound so far away.

Now you've got no plans when you wake up, just keep on keeping on.

Now the morning fades to light, to twilight, to night.

Now you rinse and repeat.

Now you remove the sleeve and remove the film.

Now you remove the sleeve and pierce the film several times.

Now dinner takes exactly 2:30 minutes.

Now the earth hurtles through the universe around a giant ball of fire.

Now none of your acquaintances know they're really your only friends.

Now none of your friends know they're just acquaintances.

Now you've got to get used to being alone, like when you're born, like when you die.

Now you're free.

Now you can do whatever you want.

You just have to do it alone.

chidapunyasukala

Before I Met You..

before i met you,

time moves fast

days so soon last

anger unmanageable

sorrow uncontainable

words cannot be trust

mind seems began to rust

each second pass in waste

living life in such a haste

things were just things

life has little meaning

before i met you,

i never care much

i never felt touched

i always have doubts

i often wonder about

never felt that i am tough

never thought that i would be in love

but hey,

i told you,right?

that was before i met you..

chidapunysukala

Serunut!

tenet slow gila, eventhough bru topup quota..
nevertheless,something happen today that totally worth all the tiredly busy day..
ahhh,it made my day....
hoyeahhhh!

MEREKA~~

lame tak menulis..rasa kekok pulak nak start tulis balik..hmm,ok! tadi aq ada terbaca post kawan aq on facebook dan dia menulis pasal sorang perempuan cantik dengan nama Rara Zikry yang da meninggal..innalillahiwainnailaihirojiunn..
Tapi, sapa Rara Zikry?? 
Ok i admit memang da lama aq tak mengikuti perkembangan dunia melalui tv or surat khabar mahu pun surat layang. so, aq pun google la..and yang aq jumpa ceritanya dia koma sebabkan just a mild athma attack..then after dia sedar dari koma dia xleh gerak or cakap or kesimpulannya dia dah tak macam dia yang dulu and family dia ada plead untuk kos rawatan dia..n I was like.."Ohh..camtu"..
but then aq terfikir..kenapa kes dia sangat viral kt internet and media suma??
Aq just curious to know.....kalo die tak cantik macam tuh orang ramai ambik kisah tak??
Memang kecantikan dia tuh pemberian Allah,no doubt about that tapi as a human being aq ada perasaan ingin tahu,macam mana reaction semua orang terhadap kes dia nih..will it stll be like this??
Tapi daripada peng-google-an aq pun respond to case dia nih berbeza-beza..ramai yang simpati,tapi ada jugak sesetengah pihak yang tak tahu lah nak kata; dengki or apa-apa la yg cuba mencari semua kesalahan and keburukan dia untuk disebar kat internet,konon ank kata ape yg jadi kat dia tu sebagai pembalasan or yang sewaktu dengannya..whats the point and ape yang dorg dapat?aq pon tak tahu..
tapi bagi aq kisah dia nih tak sesedih kisah kawan aq sendiri yang aq kenal dan tengok perubahan awal dia sendiri depan mata aq..dia cute, kecil molek and sangat active dlm sports..suddenly lepas cuti sekolah dia balik semula ke asrama dengan muka membengkak ang kulit badan mengelupas..kalau duduk dekat dengan dia boleh nampak yg badan dia makin membengkak dan boleh nampak urat2 suma..then 2 bulan lepas tuh ada sorang member aq yang satu dorm dengan dia bagi tau aq yang dia ada penyakit sendi,and dia tak boleh bergerak.....and she only got to live until she's 18....ada satu malam tuh dia tak boleh bangun dari katil dia sendiri and she wet the bed..tapi dia tough,mulut sentiasa basah dengan zikir..her parents did a good job raising her as a muslimah..eventhough she's gone now - not at age 18 as said by the doctor,she's staying alive for a couple of years after - i hope and insyaAllah i pray for her for Allah to granted her(and my mom,*love u mak!)  Jannah.


Al-Fatihah to all of them..
-sooner or later i'll be joining all of you too...








chidapunyasukala

ntahla...

arituh aq tengok satu cerita kat tv9. tajuk dia "isteriku zulaikha". best cite nih. ada satu part dalam cita nih yang aq suka bilamana satu character (aq tak ingat nama dia apa tapi lakonan zul handyblack) tuh sebut satu ayat...

"jika Allah boleh memberikan seribu cinta dengan hanya satu pandangan pertama, Dia juga mampu menarik semula nikmat cinta itu dengan sejuta kebencian. so, ape yang dimegahkan sangat dengan cinta tu??"

betul. sangat-sangat betul dan aq rasa pernah terjadi kepada aq walaupun cinta@sayang aq tuh just antara kawan tapi situasi dia sama la. kalo dulu tido sebantal, makan share sesama, kemana pon sekali, gila pon sesama tapi now bila jumpa rasa tak de pape pn nak cakap.feel pon da tak 100% dah.. sumanya sebab kesilapan-kesilapan kecil yang dilakukan berulang2 kali  sehingga terjadinya satu kesilapan besar. hmm,ntahla...


tapi aq takde la benci dia, tak sampai tahap tu lagi....and takkan sampai kot insyaAllah..........




chidapunyasukala

Smosh..again!!!

di sini aq ingin maklumkan bahawa aq da abes tgk 1 channel smosh iaitu IanH. yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
dalam mase seminggu je sedar tak sedar aq da abes da tgk Ian Is Bored and Lunchtime w/ Smosh...ade la 100 lebih gak kot vid die...owh,and anthony padilla channel as well.. tu blom masuk vid from smosh channel lg, ..kompem pny la kene hamuk ngan bapak aq hujung bulan nanti...mesti bill letrik melambung tak hingat..haha,but what can i do?? i'm really adicted rite now..im a hardcore smosher, and i create my twitter account just to follow them...cheesy,aite? ya, i know.so everyone, beware if you ever want to try to watch smosh video...
don't say that i dont warn you...............


Smosh!



chidapunyasukala


p/s :: i'm jealous of Mari.....FiretrUCK her!

benda bodoh...

suma orang suka buat menda bodoh..aq pon tak terkecuali. sonok apa buat menda bodo ni, walaupon sendiri tau menda yang dibuat tuh bodo tahap gaban tapi still seronok untuk dibuat. benda bodoh yang aq addicted buat skarang nih adalah tengok Smosh. Smosh nih sangatlah best bagi orang2 yang suka menda bodoh + merepek + pokemon + guinea pig + makan + poop + yada yada...aq siap ROTFLOL (literally) tengok one of their earliest vid, lipsync pokemon pny theme. best ever....


kengkadang rase bodoh gak tengok orang buat mende bodoh tapi mende bodoh yang diorang buat mendatangkan $$$ buat diorang dan menghabiskan masa buat aq..whatever,






chidapunyasukala


p/s anthony padilla is hawt!!!!!!!!!owh, ian is quite okay thou...

A Heart Acts

this is one more piece that i wrote dated Sunday,21/12/08
i read it over and over again, 
and i think that it's good,ahaks!

This is an empty heart jots
A lot of spaces and empty spots
This is an aching heart rhyme
Will it be or not mend by time
This is an angry heart say
Will sorry put out the flame away
This is a lost heart wave
Is there a way for me that have been paved
This is a longing heart desire
with you, i am on fire
This is a desperate heart lures
Take me with you and i be yours
This is a confuse heart write
Will decision made be wrong or right
And this is the brave heart screaming
Fight for your love or die trying!

chidapunyasukala

Artist

thanks to the artist, wat susah2 je lukis gambo sye ni...(padahal dok pakse org lukis...)

 thanks gak sbab bg aq picnap sketch ko yg nih...i loikke dis one,

chidapunyasukala

e-mail..

pernah ade yahoo mail account?? kalo ade mesti korang perasan dulu dia pny sign-in box lain sket dengan yang skarang. mase 1st time aq bukak and tengok die da lain sket tuh,ada 1 benda yang aq paling notice skali; e-mail address sample die kat bawah tu.nak taw sbab pe??

itu e-mail address abang aq......

yes, free2rhyme@yahoo.com tu is my bro's e-mail add..

~~and sampai skrg pon die dok bangge lg,haish................

chidapunyasukala

Cantik.....?!

Aristotle called beauty "the gift of God"

Socrates called it "a short-lived tyranny"

Theophrastus, "a silent deceit"

Theocritus, "an ivory mischief"

Carneades, "a sovereignty which stood in need of no guards"

The beauty that addresses itself to the eyes is only the spell of the moment; the eye of the body is not always that of the soul."  

~George Sands~

Cantik. penting sangat ke?? for me, cantik itu subjektif dan cuma hanya pinjaman je."beauty is in the eyes of the beholder". sesetengah benda or orang yang kita anggap cantik tak semestinya cantik di mata orang lain. tapi, semua orang suka cantik. nak baju cantik, nk tengok pemandangan yang cantik, nak awek cantik, nak balak cantik (hensem), kalo boleh makan pun nak makanan yang cantik-cantik je hiasannye. kadang-kadang ade jugak sesuatu yang tak cantik tapi baik,bagus,elok, dan bernilai dari sudut yang lain. time-time camni orang akan cakap, "beauty is only skin deep".

“It is not beauty that endears, it's love that makes us see beauty”
~Tolstoy~

Does perfect beauty stand in need of praise at all?
Nay; no more than law, no more than truth,
no more than loving kindness, nor than modesty. 

~ Ibid ~ 

chidapunyasukala

Boss...

heavennye kalo dpt bg kt boss....

chidapunyasukala

Ashraf..

sedang aq menyelak2 buku nota untuk melayan blues menulis apa yg terbuku di otak, tetiba mata aku tertangkap sesuatu yg berwarna kunen.....

ntah bila masa hang letak sticker nama hang ni dlm buku aq ni, acap???haish...

hg sja nk bg  aq igt slalu kt ang la nih....huuu,rindu ni weyh!!!!!

sayangg,bile u nk blnje i mkn mcd sayangg??

ok,take care sayangg....

muahh muahh!

(harus diingatkan di sini bahawa "sayangg" diatas adalah bahasa  kod kami berdua..tidak boleh dikaitkan dengan sebarang kontrobesi waima apa2 gosip sekalipon..sekian harap maklom......)

chidapunyasukala

Like a cake...

u're like a cake

freshly baked

in the evening with pink coloured icing

                                                         u're like a cake
yummy cake
that i devour 
without thinking of sharing

    u're not as hard as a cookie

not  as creamy as mousse

not so hot like a souffle

u're the dessert i choose

way bigger than a cuppie      

softer than a fudge

moist and tender than any pastry

u're like a cake

perfectly made!

chidapunyasukala